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December 30, 2008

Conversations With Katherine

Me: Hey. I am going to throw out all my tapestries? Do you want them?
Kat: YES! So how was your Christmas?
Me: Great! You'll be happy to know Dan bought me a new bathrobe. Do you want that too? (joking)
(Sidenote to readers: Katherine lived with me my senior year of college and constantly made fun of my severely weathered bathrobe and how much I wore I it.)
Kat: Oh my god Melissa, don't you dare throw that out. I am wearing that out on the night of your bachlorette party. I swear. Save that one for me.

And she will too. I'll post pictures.

December 29, 2008

Making the Best of It

Dan claims that he was going to post these pictures, but I know he wont so....

TODAY we had another huge snowstorm. It resulted in the carports collapsing at our local apartment complex, and Dan calling me school-yard nicknames because I would not sled down the scary hill that was far too steep and covering jagged rocks of death.

After he finished pouting, I told him I would build a snowman with him- so we decided to build the world's BIGGEST snowman EVER! Okay, its not that big, we are just super short. We also could not get any branches for he is a Wii snowman. But other then that, I think we did one hell of a job.

Stop the snow, stop the snow, stop the snow...

Remember last week when I said the snow was driving me nuts and I didn't think it could get any worse? Well its now almost a week later...and it is still snowing...and I was wrong. It can get worse. So bad that I had to cancel my appointment with the florist this morning for fear I wouldn't even be able to get out of our parking lot (THAT THEY NEVER PLOW). With 47 inches and counting I am THIS CLOSE to impulsively buying and SUV. This is bad because I DEFINITELY cannot afford an SUV. But seriously. Make it stop. Or someone write Oprah and see if she can hook me up with a Honda Pilot.

December 28, 2008

So sad its precious...

OMG THIS is the saddest, yet the most precious, thing I have ever seen in my whole life. Okay fine. Saddest most precious thing today.


Sometimes I can't help but post things I would have posted on my old blog :(

So this is funny. Jon McLaughlin (one of my favorite artists) turned down the song "Smack Into You" for his sophomore album- so Beyonce picked it up for her new album, but changed it to "Smash Into You" and took writer's credit. SOURCE

Listen to both and see which one you like better

December 26, 2008

Christmas Recapulated

So we got snowed in for Christmas. Obviously that sucks because Spokane sucks and well, we would have liked to have seen our families. But given the circumstances we rallied and Christmas didn't turn out too bad! We decided to attempt to merge our two family traditions together and start some of our own. It started with a traditional family Christmas Eve dinner. As you saw in my last post, Dan was diligently cooking a fantastic prime rib for dinner and it turned out fabulous. I mean it was so rare it still mooed, but that is how Dan enjoys his prime rib, and quite frankly it was pretty damn good, so I'm not complaining at all.

This summer Dan and I took a wine class and ended up buying a wonderful assortment of wines that we saved to open for special occasions. We opened the first bottle on the night Obama won the presidency. The second bottle we opened on Christmas Eve. We bought it because 1: The wine was great! and 2: We thought the top was super cool. However, when the man brought out the bottle a large portion of the class groaned with displeasure of its design. We were confused, but we soon figured out why. You can't get the stupid top off!!! Dan, who had managed to cut 7 pounds of prime rib without incident, sliced his hand open trying to get through the stupid wax. I ultimately prevailed, proving never send a man to do a woman's job...

After dinner I convinced Dan that every Christmas Eve my Mom and I watch Little Women. He gave me a look like I was crazy, but I told him that since we were doing his family traditions we had to do my family traditions as well. This is only slightly false because we definitely HAVE watched Little Women on Christmas Eve twice before....I think. Either way, I thought he was going to die. He was so bored it reminded me of the first time we watched Little Women in the theater and my brother Ryan, who was six at the time, insisted that he come along and tried to choke himself with popcorn halfway through to make us leave. They both hated it, which is really tragic for Dan since I intend on watching it every Christmas Eve for the rest of our lives.

Toby also got a present. He received a wonderful Christmas bone with meat tucked inside. We immediately regretted the decision because all night all we heard was him manically chewing on the stupid thing attempting to get all the meat inside.

But the next morning, much to my dismay, me moved on to a much better conquest...I'm still amazed he hasn't died.

On Christmas morning we were visited by Santa (he FOUND us!) who, as always, remembered to give me my magical orange made of chocolate that contains no more calories then a traditional orange no matter what the box says. Mmmmm...oranges for breakfast never tasted so good.

My fabulous fiance bought me the most glorious luxery bathrobe. I will pause for a moment while anybody who has ever lived with me types Dan a thank you note for giving me a reason to throw away my current bathrobe. Which I live in. Which I am pretty sure my father got free in a booth somewhere at a conference in Vegas.

Dan had almost all of his gifts because he was a good boy this year and the mail gods decided to reward him by delivering all his packages. Anything that had a gift for me involved did not make it, although I secretly think it is an evil ploy to teach me to be less materialistic. It worked. Now let my new Coach purse and fluffy duvet bedspread get here.

After presents Dan made a fantastic Greek breakfast, another family tradition. I am not going to lie...these family traditions are fabulous, but they are sooooo buying me my next gym membership because I gained like 20 pounds.

After that, we embarked on a traditional family tradition, a Christmas day movie. We went to see "Marley and Me", which anybody who follows this blog knows I have been excited about for ages. I soon realized this was a terrible idea. I cannot make it through a dog movie without crying, and this one was no different. I quietly sobbed through the whole ending. I attempted to mask my tears by rubbing them off on my sweater sleeve every other second, but that plan was quickly foiled when I accidentally let out a sobby hiccup that I am pretty sure everyone around me heard. I wasn't too embarrassed though because the WHOLE THEATER was crying. It is the only time I have ever been to a movie where all the girls were openly crying and all the guys were doing the awkward shifty movements in their chair to distract themselves from crying. Except maybe Titanic. Kill as many people as you want and a man doesn't cry, but don't mess with a man's dog.

Either way, great movie, but make sure you bring the tissues.

December 24, 2008

Happy Holidays!

For the love of snow. Posing for Christmas pictures with a dog who doesn't care, hair that has a mind of his own, and a fiance that feels the need to blink every other second is hard work.

Speaking of hard work. Want to know what else is hard work? Making Christmas Eve dinner. Yes it is. I did not mean ME personally. Ha, that's silly. I mean Dan looks like he is working hard making the prime rib for dinner. It looks difficult. I am making jello. You can't have Christmas without jello.

Speaking of jello. After spending about 3 freaking hours running all around snowy Spokane to get all the dressing for our Christmas Eve dinner, I got home and realized I had forgot the jello. Since Spokane was declared in a state of emergency today, and since it was already snowing hard, I said that there was no need for us to go back out to get jello. The next thing I know my phone is ringing with Dan's ringtone. "That is weird" I thought, "why is he calling me when he is IN THE HOUSE."

Well the little @#$@#@ decided to sneak out of the house to go get jello. Many of you might think this is sweet, but IT WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN SWEET IF HE HAD GOT IN A SNOW RELATED ACCIDENT AND DIED ON CHRISTMAS EVE!!! I'm just kidding. I thought it was sweet too (besides the risk of leaving me a widow before I even have the chance to be called a widow). While he is on his sneaky adventure, I get a text message and it says "how mad would you be if I bring a puppy home?"

I impulsively texted back "NOT MAD AT ALL!!!!"

I re-thought that message immediately after. Was he serious? I mean, we want another dog- but do we really want another dog right now? In the middle of a snowstorm? In this tiny apartment? When I heard the door open my heart leapt.


Just kidding.

Apparently they were giving out free puppies at Yokes and he seriously considered bringing one home. Luckily he had the same second thoughts that I did. I am glad that he didn't bring it home...but secretly....I wouldn't have minded that much.


December 22, 2008

STOP THE SNOW (for Toby's sake...)

This morning I woke up guessed it...more snow. This caused me to press my face against the frosty window pane and scream "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP SNOWING!!!!!" I then repeatedly banged my forehead against the window in hopes of offering my pain as penance to the snow-making Gods. I don't know what I did to cause massive amounts of snow across the whole northwest but I am so SO sorry.

I can't take it anymore. If it snows ONE MORE FLAKE I am going to LOSE IT! I feel TRAPPED. Every time we try to leave this apartment its like we are RISKING OUR LIVES AND I AM SICK OF IT! Somebody needs to fly me somewhere tropical ASAP.

I am bored too. This really should not be the case since I have a huge brief to write and a wedding to plan. Plus I bought the Marley and Me book in an attempt to reread it before seeing the moving. But no, I spend my time emasculating my dog by dressing him up in Christmas decorations.

Before you feel bad for Toby you should know that he gets a doggie treat after after every pose- so his patience are well rewarded.

December 21, 2008

Mmmmm...Christmas Cookies!

Things That Make Me Happy #3: Popcorn Tins

Dan brought home a holiday popcorn tin about a month ago and acted like he just found out Santa wasn't real when I told him I had never had one. Little did he know the addiction that he would start...THESE THINGS ARE AMAZING! I love them. Yesterday I literally had to WWF wrestle a women in Wal-Mart just to get the last one. They are perfect because I like the butter and Dan likes the carmel. The problem comes with the cheddar. We both like the cheddar the best, which results in mass cheddar binges before the other person can eat it all.

I typically win.

Sad, Sad, Sad...

Well, we made national news:


And of course this years winter had been so freaking mild that Dan and I decided that we could easily make a trip to ID and UT. But of course, the first snow of the winter decided to be 24 inches and we got more last night. So Dan and I are snowed in Spokane for Christmas, but we are determined to make it a fun Christmas nonetheless!

Currently Dan and I are sitting transfixed reminiscing and watching the old school Disney version of Robin Hood.

December 18, 2008

More Snow Pictures

Did I Move to Alaska In My Sleep?

Good News: After two weeks of studying non stop and 6 days full of 18 hours worth of sitting for finals, I am officially DONE! And by done, I mean REALLY done. Next semester I only have TWO finals so I will never be put through this level of hell again in my law school career.

Bad News: I almost died trying to get to my final. The law school sent out a notice at the beginning of the week saying NO MATTER WHAT we had to make it to our finals. My last final was last night at 6 PM. That morning I woke up to it snowing....and snowing...and it continued to snow through the whole entire day.

Dan insisted that he drive me to my final. I was already in my bad finals mood-so I preceded to explain to him that under no uncertain terms would I need him to drive me. I can drive on snow. I grew up in Idaho. I was BORN in the snow. I learned to WALK on the snow. DRIVING in snow is a piece of cake. But luckily for Dan (and myself), my will to fight had been worn down so much over the past few weeks that I finally relented and let him drive me to my final. And while I hate to admit it, I am glad that he did. I don't think I have ever seen conditions so bad- and it was during rush hour so people were slipping and sliding all over. There were over 200 accidents and while going over the Hamilton bridge we saw a semi that had jackknifed across the whole road and slammed into a poll. Good times.

This morning we woke up and it IS STILL SNOWING. While drinking my morning cup of coffee I turned on the news to find out that Spokane broke a record. Yes, apparently the record for the most snowfall in 24 hours has been held at 13 inches. Yesterday we broke it with 17 inches!!! If I didn't know better I would think Sarah Palin was my governor.

Here are some pictures:

The ugly hill behind our apartment complex is shielded from most of the snow and wind and still looks like this.

Cars couldn't make it up the hill last night so there are about 20-40 parked at the bottom. This is what they found this morning.

Toby does not understand that it is far too cold outside and absolutely insisted that he be let outside to pee.

He later realized this was a bad idea.

He immediately crawled back into bed and I haven't seen him for the last two hours.

December 17, 2008


My friend Katherine and I rarely agree on anything when it comes to music or TV. Thus whenever I come across something I think we both will watch I sometimes feel as though I have found a way to end a great world war. That is how I felt when I found these clips of Britney and Ellen caroling...

I know. I should be studying for my last final. Shut up.

December 14, 2008

Amy Poeler's Last Night on SNL

Seriously. What funny women are left on this show now?

December 12, 2008

Happy Birthday to My One and Only

Dear Dan,

Happy Birthday!!!

I think we can all breath a collective sigh of relief that you lived to see this birthday. Not to be morbid, but ever since you insisted on explaining to me the symbolic meaning behind the Forever 27 poster (while simultaneously demanding we hang it in our guest bedroom even though it is bound to give all guests nightmares), I have had a terrifying fear that you would fall to the same fate as all your idols. You really should consider loving the music of living people. Perhaps you could become a Britney Spears fan, and as an added bonus we would no longer have to fight over whose ipod gets played in the car.

But THANK GOD you made it to the big 2-8. This day is especially important because for the next 4 months it seems to those who don't know us better that you are 4 years older then me. Which is a lot in high school years, and I enjoy making references about how my parents would totally have refused to let us date in high school because you were too old for me. You then will tell me to stop acting immature, to which I will reply "Touche!" But I am allowed to be immature because I am still young and vibrant.

You have to take an exam on your birthday- which I cannot think of a worse way to spend your birthday...of course last year I was on a plane for 8 hours on my birthday. Yet at the end of those eight hours I was in the Florida Keys with okay, you win. But I promise you next year- when we have no finals and have lots of money- we will celebrate your birthday like you REALLY deserve...

...because YOU, more then anybody, deserve the best birthday ever. You truly are the best fiance a girl could ask for. You wake up at 7 AM to take Toby outside in the blistering cold so that I can keep sleeping (even though you always fall asleep after me). You go with me to the grocery store even though you have a million things to do because you know I don't like going to the store alone when its dark. When you make dinner (which is most nights), you will start doing the dishes even though its MY job and you don't even complain. You always buy me chocolate when you go to the store even though you don't like it. And while we're on the subject, you keep eating my Christmas cookies even though I KNOW you think they are too sweet.

You truly are the best man in the world- and deserve a better birthday then I could ever give you. You should know I called and tried to get an automatic A for you on your exam (not like you need it). They started laughing, which I took as a no, but one year- I promise to give you the birthday present you deserve (which is going to cost a lot of money so good thing we went into the right profession).

But just as a side note... if you don't like your birthday presents this year....just remember that I am moving to Dallas next year.

love you!

December 9, 2008


Do you understand the lyrics to THIS song on the new Britney Spears album?

For Christmas...

I am buying me THIS
And I am buying Dan THIS

December 8, 2008

Sorry. They are going to be late.

Finals are killing me and I haven't even started TAKING THEM yet. The only thing that gets me through is reading other law student's facebook status messages that seem to indicate that they are in as much pain as me. Misery loves company. At any rate- this is my pathetic way of saying that Christmas cards are going to be late this year because when I sat down to write them tonight my hand literally rebelled and said that if it isn't holding a wine glass as oppossed to a pen it will use the other hand to cut itself off.

So I went for the wine, naturally.

And while drinking I found this great clip of David Archuleta singing "A Thousand Miles"- which I though I'd post in hopes it would make some other depressed law students as happy as it made me.


December 7, 2008

If Toby isn't Careful...

..THIS will be him. Just give me a scooter and a backpup!

New Preview!

During finals I am only allowed to post one thing a day to get it out of my system so I can concentrate. This morning I found a NEW trailer for Marley and Me (which I fully intend on seeing Christmas Day) and I thought I would share it with everyone. If this doesn't make you want to see this movie...well, you are cold, evil, dog-hating person.

December 6, 2008


While studying for finals, I have tried everything that I can to learn the material and NOT ACTUALLY do any work. So far all of my attempts have failed miserably. Yet my hopes were revived when I saw this clip below and thought to myself "You CAN truly be lazy AND get the job done. You just have to be creative enough."


December 5, 2008


Ever since I moved out of the house all I have wanted is a Christmas tree and have never been able to get one. This was not such a big deal in undergrad since I had plenty of time to enjoy my parent's Christmas tree- but since law school has STOLEN CHRISTMAS FROM ME (especially my 1L year when I was not able to fly in until CHRISTMAS DAY only to leave shortly after)- a Christmas tree in the home has been a top priority.

This year we opted for this pretty little number. Her name is Fern. She is beautiful. But apparently allergic to lights because she refuses to let any of them STAY ON. If anybody has useful tips on WHAT THE HELL could be wrong with our Christmas lights, please send your suggestions my way.

And Merry Christmas.

December 4, 2008

Winter Song

Okay. So everybody has to go check out my new favorite Christmas song...which is not really a Christmas song at all- it is a winter song. So much so it is actually called Winter Song. I totally just got why they called it that. Anyways, it is an absolutely beautiful duet by Sara Bareilles (my FAVORITE) and Ingrid Michaelson. It is a must check out- and you can watch the adorable video that goes with it HERE.

December 3, 2008

Proposition 8- The Musicial

with celebrities!

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Nancy Grace courtesy of Bitter Lawyer

I know that just hearing Nancy Grace's voice makes many people's skin crawl- but the people at Bitter Lawyer put together a montage of some of her best on-air moments (including losing to Regis on Jeopardy and badgering Elizabeth Smart on-air) Its really worth the headache.

Check it out HERE

December 1, 2008

Hospital Adventures

So I fully intended on making this blog about Dan and I's first Christmas tree- but I had an unexpected detour.

I don't know if I was just enthusiastic about the HUGE GONZAGA WIN LAST NIGHT (Go Zags!), but shortly after the game I started feeling some chest pains and I thought perhaps I just had heartburn. After awhile it started to hurt bad enough that I couldn't stand up, so I figured that I better go to the Emergency Room because if it WAS heartburn it would go away probably during the wait , and if I had a massive heart attack or a blood clot heading for my heart (my other fear), at least I would be at the ER.

So you would think that writing "crippling chest pain" on my entrance form would move my name up on the list- but no, Dan and I definitely had to wait to be seen for about two hours. During the whole time we were waiting we were able to witness some of Spokane's finest. My favorite was the women who was obviously strung out on something crazy. She enjoyed jumping rope in the middle of the room...with no rope. But she really reached her peak when she decided she wanted to move a chair next to me and Dan and STARE AT US with her creepy strung out eyes. This is how bad it hurt people. I still stayed.

After the wait, we were taken back into the acute pain section and I was surprised at how long they kept me waiting and then decided to treat me like I was dying. They instantly hooked me up to a billion wires and tubes, gave me a chest x ray, an EKG, and made me take shots of medicine that made my mouth go numb. But ironically the worst part was when the RN decided to give me an IV. I made the mistake of informing him that I had amazing veins and if he messed up it would be his fault. Of course, as karma would have it, he couldn't get the IV in and left the needle HANGING OUT OF MY ARM WHILE HE WENT AND TURNED ON THE LIGHT. The doctor decided to come in at that moment and asked me how I was doing. Dan saw the look on my face as I watched the RN poking around in my arm like the game Operation and told the doctor he should probably come back to ask that question.

I felt very safe with my Doctor because his name was Dr. Bauer and he obviously was related to Jack Bauer. He informed me that some blood tests came back weird so I then got the pleasure of getting a CAT scan. I immediately informed him I was claustrophobic and would not go in that little tube, but apparently that is the MRI. He told me CAT scans are much better because you are in an open space. This is true...but what he failed to inform me was that the blue dye they flushed through my body made me feel like I was on fire...and that I was peeing (I wasn't). I think I would have preferred the MRI.

After 7 hours in the ER they finally told me that I had viral bronchitis and my pain was the result of an inflamed lung. I immediately clapped with happiness because it wasn't a blood clot, but more then anything it wasn't heartburn and I was terrified I had just been put through hell for nothing. The doctor prescribed me some intense meds so I was a happy camper.

Dan deserves major props for escorting me to the hospital, and only making a few "are you going to be embarrassed when this is heartburn?" snips. Either way, he was great and I am very lucky to have him. And Codine.


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